I Wish that I Missed Church

It used to be that I’d know what day of the week it was by how long it had been since I’d last gone to church. These days, I’m a bit better about knowing the time – but not so good about going to church. The interesting thing these days is when I see people from church; “So it’s been awhile since we’ve seen you at church. We missed you.” Is something I hear every now and then. It’s even more awkward when I meet somebody from the church before that …

Thinking back – I’m not sure that there was anything to miss. Making friends in a tight-knit church isn’t easy and I never really fell into any of the groups that were there – I was usually too young (for the elders), too old (for the youth), and too single (for the marrieds). And it wasn’t like the music was all that great – just old-fashioned hymns that didn’t speak to me. I’d rather not sing them at than to have no choice but to sing them and them alone. The preaching wasn’t bad … but I’m not sure if it’s enough to justify putting up with the bad music and being isolated in a crowd. Sunday school … well, they were trying but it wasn’t working either. So it seems, they miss me at church a whole lot more than I miss going to church.

But judging by some of the interactions I have with various kinds of Christians online, it’s probably for the best. The more I’m out of church, the more my beliefs fall away from the pre-approved labels of Calvinism or Arminianism or what have you. There’s a lot of it that – to be honest – I just don’t care about. So much of it doesn’t apply, so I don’t see why I should have to agree that it’s a valid teaching.

I know that if I went to one of the local churches, the more they’d try to supply with a fix of their particular teaching – something that’s out of my system now but they want me to become re-addicted to. They’d want me to turn, to reform into one of their own. It makes me feel that it’s not really about me – but how they can mold me into their image rather than helping me bring out Christs’ image in me. That’s one thing I really don’t miss about church.

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...Anyway, that's just how I feel about it ... What do you think?

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